“Nick Has To Do…” will be on hiatus until December, due to NaNoWriMo. We apologize to our reader(s)

1) Stock up on Halloween Candy
2) Stock up on coffee
3) And chocolate milk powder
4) Put my eyes on the (metaphorical) prize
5) Commence countdown to literary abandon…

1) Develop foldable unicycle
2) Sell it as an urban commute vehicle
3) Make bank. Lots of bank
4) Live the highlife of a unicycle celebrity
5) Die penniless and in anonymity

Unicycles: fun
Despite the circus music
Fuck you, J. Fucik

1) Go whale watching
2) Develop a method of attaching the watches to the whales
3) Of course, just strap it onto the narwhals’ modified tooth…
4) I know what a llama is, but what or who is “Rama”, and what does it/they have to do with llamas & ding-dongs?
5) Develop an ice cream concoction which includes two scoops of ice cream (your choice off flavor) floating in the driest gin available. Call it a ” Ship of the Dessert “

1) Develop aerosol spray of caffeine
2) Oooh, time release caffeine pills!
3) Scratch that, time release caffeine patch!
4) Better still! Use nanotechnology to create nanobots that synthesize caffeine from within the body!
5) Fuck it, two-fist coffee and Monster

1) Notice the Bailey’s is gone
2) Develop a hypothesis as to why
3) Test my hypothesysus
4) Tes agai fur consisensee
5) Heya, wnch, your purty

1) Outline novel for NaNoWriMo
2) Determine what will bring characters to life
3) Bring characters to life
4) Cower in basement as villain takes over the world
5) Plan to only write erotica for next year’s NaNoWriMo

1) Go on vendetta against the fairy company for not publicizing their recall more broadly, leading to the early spoilage of my coffee cream
3) Weep for my coffee
4) Scour the kitchen for a cream replacement
5) Weep, too decaffeinated to make my way to the store to replace it, or complete my vendetta, then slowly slide into the black abyss…

My coffee, uncreamed
It tastes like my own sadness
Fatigued now, goodnight


Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.

Join 753 other followers